I am sure many people may look at the title and think it is about having sex in a chair. It is not. When I say armchair sex, I am lifting the term from armchair analysis, which mean to think about something or read about something without experiencing it firsthand. Most of the study of history is armchair analysis.

So why am I talking about armchair sex? Well, I am a virgin, but it has not stopped me from developing pretty advance ideas about sex and sexuality. Two quick examples: I know my favorite part of the body is the mind, and I know I am bi. It has been recently pointed out to me that I cannot actually know what I do and do not want if I had never done it before.

I was also thinking that all fantasies are, in a way, armchair sex. People think, read and speculate on that which they have no firsthand knowledge of, and it becomes something they are sure they want and are down to try.

Any thoughts on the matter?

 

Just out of curiosity (because I recently posted a similar thing) did you just now take this never-had/can't-know idea out of my post in the hug thread?

this ^

Because it would be cool if you did, but then again this is not a foreign concept to most virgins most likely.

 

No. Went out with some friends on Saturday and one of them pointed it out to me. I did not know about the other thread.

 

Before you go assuming that all people on this site are just amateur individuals with over active imaginations, you may want to take a look around. There are many, many people here that are quite knowledgeable and experienced in the many different forms of sex. Although you may not have experienced actual sex, do not project that image on everyone.

 

I'm surprised the virgin threads are so rare considering this is a porn forum and porn is the staple sex life to us virgins. I can't know, but I'd assume the people with sex lives would be out having sex and would not have ever heard about a porn forum because they were out having sex for a sex life and not looking at porn.

 

I was not saying that everyone is an amateur, I was only questioning what one knows versus what they think they know. It is an exploration in epistemology. That is all. Moreover, I think imagination is great. Seen though or not, there is always value in an idea.

 

This is all way too deep for me - Epistemology indeed!
The more I read these forum threads the more I think I actually am a dumb blonde!
A man has a cock he wants to put inside a woman
She in turn has a cunt she wants filling, preferably with a cock
Job done!

 

True enough, but sometimes, there must be more.

 

No matter how good one's imagination may be, when I am editing a story, I can tell if the writer is a virgin about halfway down page one. That said, anyone can certainly know what they want or don't want, without experiencing it first.

 

Oh yes, sometimes. Sometimes there's that little ole thing called lurve!
And we all know what that can lead to...............

 

And what is that, out of curiosity?

 

Stop developing anymore advanced ideas about sex. And get yourself laid.

 

Armchair sex? I never heard of that before.

However, as a teen I used to have sex with the back of a wooden kitchen table chair when the vacuum cleaner wasn't available.

 

Advance ideas are signs that thought and consideration was put into something. I am sure that even after I do get laid, it will not stop me from thinking about it. Why stop?

 

Advanced ideas are fantasies to help you jerk off. What advanced ideas you have come up with by now. Should be tried out in the field. Get out of the lab. Thinking, developing ideas all you want is not the same as actually doing it. When the time comes don't worry. You might be finished before your pants hit the floor.

 

While that is true, if the majority of your advanced ideas are based from watching porn, there is a very good chance you may be disappointed when you finally tear up your V-plates.

Plus you have the distinct possibility that, because you have over-thought it and in turn put your desires on a pedestal, YOU may end up being disappointed in yourself, or unable to perform due to fear of not measuring up, or at the very least scaring away your potential partner.

As to your thoughts on fantasies only being based on something the fantasizer has no knowledge of, I have to disagree, the majority of my recent fantasies have been about sex with my partner, she hasn't been well and as a result sex has been a no-go area, I think a more apt description would be that a person fantasizes about what they can't HAVE as opposed to what they don't KNOW, to further that point, I know what her nipples feel like on my tongue, I know what her kisses taste like and I remember how she looks and what sounds she makes when she has an orgasm, but I miss those feelings, sights and sounds, as a direct result of that, I fantasize about the next time.

 

Too numerous to mention - but ranging the full gamut from love to hate, sexual paradise to eventual marital hell, blissful honeymoon to heart wrenching divorce - but hopefully, if you are one of the lucky ones, a wonderfully compromised stop in the middle.
Cynical? Yes, I suppose I am.
I experienced all three ranges in my first marriage, but am now experiencing the compromise in my second.
Will it last, or will I go through the full range yet again? Who knows?

 

I will concede that you may be right. I am not entirely sure if there is anything I can do to 100% prevent it.

 

First off excellent question! While you or any other person can not truly know what the outcome of any fantasy or new sexual adventure will be the fact is you can know that your feelings toward it are genuinely interested in pursuing it and isn't that what a lifetime of sexual exploring is all about. People are so quick to judge the statement "I know" when what I'm saying is "I know for me personally", it establishes a base of anticipation that through careful planning has a more then better chance of succeeding rather then leaving it to chance. Like you when I was younger I took a more then just passing interest in the sciences that governed sexuality that most parents wouldn't explain, my peers couldn't care less about and most lied about or embellished in hope that I would either fear it or pursue it blindly.

What I discovered about sex was that is was way more complex then love and just like love required the planning and timing of calculated risks to be successful. So while you may have yet to experience it, this stage of contemplation is very important and can serve as a guide to less painful mistakes in the future over following just your genitals which just causes them.

 

Glad I am not wasting my time. I often feel that my thoughts do build up anxiety though, while at the same time, more appealing. So many things to consider. So many variables to contemplate. Part of me wants to go in with reckless abandon, but a larger part of me knows that could be a really bad idea.